We are back with more Ark: Survival Evolved Updates! We last left off with me proclaiming I was going to catch a Spino, and guess what!? WE DID… but! It wasn’t the first thing that went down. Things have escalated quickly and while I am still scared of everything, we’ve branched out further and made some new discoveries. Here’s what’s been going on in Ark!

First things first. As much as I wanted to get that Spino, I was still nervous that the plan wouldn’t work out. We ended up accidentally taming two Sarcos first. See, we found a new base spot we really liked and we were out exploring. I saw a Sarco down the beach and I thought we should get rid of it, but the sun was setting and I knew we’d need to wait to go back. It is impossible to see at night. As the sun began to rise, a sudden storm opened up on us which immediately darkened the scene again.

We decided we’d at least try to get a sense of the area, but surprise, the Sarco had moved waaaayyy up the beach and was suddenly right in front of us. I remember the moment I went underwater to sneak a look and OOP SARCO. I ran on shore and we took advantage of the awkward terrain. We knocked it out and as we started the taming process, ANOTHER SARCO APPEARED! Again, we knocked that fool out and started taming. We did not expect it, but it ended up being a great situation. Can I just say, having a Sarco with you is amazing? I accidentally ran into a bad situation with a Dilophosaurus attacking us (It’s also a freaking Diloph), which caused some Triceratops to freak out and well, Sarco did work… and then I shit my pants.

The Sarcos are gigantic crocodiles and while they aren’t the best at land terrain, they are amazing in the water. The best part is that piranhas flee when a Sarco enters the water so no more piranha drama! They are also super fast so we’ve been able to skip over to other coasts and explore the shoreline… not too far inland though because it’s so scary! They led us to a great spot where we found a Carnotaurus that was terrorizing a beach and we tranq’d that fool too!

Anyway, after that, we thought we should go for the Spino. We’ve caught a few carnivores; why not? We returned to the original camp, climbed up above it and shot down… it worked! The problem is tranq’d animals will run when they’re about to pass out and Spinos are fast. He went running and it took a little to catch up, but we quickly knocked him out and tamed him. Our first big carnivore and the start of me turning Ark into a Pokemon simulator.

Remember when I said there was another Spino nearby? Well, that guy randomly despawned so that was a bummer. We decided to travel further up the coast and actually came across a different Spino. Getting to him was dramatic and we had a bad run-in with venomous Troodons killing us almost immediately. Luckily, we got back with Sarcos and let them handle it for us (by the way, we caught a third Sarco). So, Spino hunt commences from the top of rocks. This dude can stand up on his back legs which was terrifying, but fortunately, we could position ourselves just out of reach. Second Spino acquired!

With two Spinos, we felt unstoppable and discovered our latest favorite camp location. This is where my Pokemon simulator explodes. First of all, there’s a ton of dinos I haven’t seen before. I’m feeling confident with my carnivore parade. We’re running through everything… but in the distance I see… a T-Rex! I can’t stop staring at it. My boyfriend is asking me to go back to camp repeatedly and I’m lagging trying to figure out if I can get this thing. He’s free-roaming and I don’t see any landscape to use to my advantage… Until he runs across the water to attack a Stegosaurus. Now’s my chance! He’s distracted fighting that thing so I start laying into him with tranq arrows. I finally get enough to knock him out, the Stego runs, and I stay with him on the beach through the night until he is tamed. T-REX!!!!

… but that Stego… I drop off the T-Rex and I go back after the Stego. She impales me on her tail, but I survive! She’s slow, but she’s cute and the group continues to grow. My boyfriend tranqs a random Pteranodon, the flying dino, and we catch him too!

I realize that some of my strategy now has to be based off enemies being stuck on things because I’m going to get killed otherwise… which is exactly how I caught a Megaladon. I had no intention of going off into the ocean because that is TERRIFYING, but I found a Megaladon that seemed to be caught in some shallow water. The thing couldn’t move so I decided to see if I could tranq it… and I did. The weird thing I figured out with the shark is that it will only follow if you are underwater. If you’re in the water and you’re not fully submerged, it won’t follow… but if you go under, poof! There she is.

We catch a couple of Triceratops and we try to get another T-Rex that was stuck on a rock. We did knock it out, but our dumb Sarcos ran over and attacked it on accident trying to kill a stupid Dilophosaurus (see!?) that hit us. Then, I accidentally got our Sarcos to mate and a tiny baby Sarco was born! I put the egg in front of our fireplace and led her tiny butt out of our house when she hatched. She ended up hiding under Penelope, the Stegosaurus, until she was big enough to be allowed out further from the house. You can see it in the above picture of Penelope.

And finally… I see a pack of three Allosaurus. I’m instantly in love, I want them, but they are huge and they are fast. There’s no way I can get them, especially since they all stay together. I sadly watch them from the water every time I see them, hoping to find an opening. One day I’m swimming down the shoreline and I see a big Spino as well as only two of the Allosaurus further down the beach. I assume the third is around somewhere, only to find that she got stuck far away from them on some trees… IT’S TIME! I take advantage of her being stuck in the trees, tranq her, and then I have to cut her free to finally bring her home (not sure why there is no sound).

Now we’ve got a full squad of some big babies and I love them. We thought we’d bring our Spinos on another adventure back in the area where we caught our Sarcos, but we actually got our asses kicked by a level two Alpha raptor. He was stuck on something and we thought we’d be able to get him, but he was totally unresponsive to tranqs. This is probably because he was a total health god and he ended up murdering us. Our Sarcos and Spinos were left with him… we ran back naked and came up on my Sarco and Spino still fighting it. We finally killed it and ran back home… but not before having a wild Sarco burst out of the murky lake to attack me. Thanks Princess and Spike for saving me. I was obviously too stressed to record anything from that, so enjoy this cute group photo.

In non-taming news, we found a cave, got some Obsidian and could finally craft things like scissors for some much-needed haircuts. Didn’t run into any danger the first time, so we sauntered in there again like it’s no big deal… only to be surprised by I have no idea wtf they were, but they gave us rabies and we ran outside and died next to our dinos. Luckily, getting back was okay and we recovered.

Man, this game is chaotic and I have SO MANY STORIES to tell. I feel like I’m just writing a big list of aannnddd theeennn, and then and then and then and then… NO AND THEN! I can’t wait to get back on and see what’s in store for us. We still haven’t left the lower left quadrant of the map. I’m scared!!!! But at least I have a lot of cute dinos to keep me company!